Friday, February 13, 2015

Love language

My man never laid a guilt trip on his congregations. He even  refused to be called "Reverend",  "Pastor" or "Doctor".  Like his mentor Ray Stedman,  he was simply "Ted".  I loved that about him.

Last week's blog hit a nerve,  I hafta wonder how many women maneuvered a way to get your husbands to read it. It would seem such a simple goal for husbands to desire to learn their wife's love language. Nope. Ted didn't. ...for years. He just couldn't "get" that words like "Jo can bounce ten balls at once. She is so resourceful!"  didn't do a bloomin' thing for my woman/soul.  I needed words about my heart; my character traits...not about my performance.   I listened to Ted Stone teach the Book from pulpits,  in living rooms, under trees, on hillsides,  in restaurants.  Once I said to him: "You'd preach to a stump!"  His reply: "Yep. ...if it would sprout!" ...but across the breakfast table or next to me for a thousand nights?  He couldn't seem to cough up words that touched my soul.  His love language was deeds. I felt guilty because I wasn't grateful enough for his deeds. My guilt increased as we travelled and taught in poverty-stricken countries where women are treated like dirt, live in dirt,  feel like dirt and manage to survive. Barely.

...and then the Cavalry came over the hill.  God 1) turned to me, 2) heard my cry, 3 )lifted my foot out of the miry clay and 4) set it upon a ROCK,  and 5) made my footsteps firm....then He 6)  put a new song in my mouth; a song of praise. Result: Many are seeing and hearing.  That's Psalm 40:1-3. God asks us to wait and trust Him while He is doing six things.  Ted's and my personal "Cavalry" will remain unidentified, for this dear couple would be embarrassed if I told you who they are. They lovingly confronted us; nobody else had had the courage,  for after all, weren't we the "experts"?That's the downside of  being professional pastors, missionaries and counselors. We are supposed to know it all.   We don't!  You see, Ted and I hit the ground running when we were introduced to Jesus at 20 years of age. We didn't know we even had a soul.  For eight years our brains were stuffed with doctrine, with not one class that mentioned emotions. I knew I had 'em, but considered any emotion but joy to be sin.  Anger?  Oh, my no.  Ted never got angry so I concluded that my tears had to be about something I was not grateful for. ...and then there is that confusing scripture in Ephesians about being angry, not sinning and for Jesus' sake, never going to sleep angry...so I didn't.  I took a drug to help me sleep, but only my Christian doctor and I knew....except for Jesus.  He knew.

I began to search the scriptures daily.  Ecclesiastes became my corner-turning Book.  I am not sure exactly how that happened.  I won't be writing any manuals because I believe The Manual that God wrote says it all. ...if we read it and ask the Holy Spirit to tell us exactly what God is personally saying to us,  believe it and act on it!

I just took a break to make a second cup o' coffee in my Keurig,  looked out my kitchen window and there are buzzards and red-tail hawks circling above something dead on the mountain above my house.  Thankfully,  it's not me, so let's proceed.

Currently I am listening to the death rattle of some male egos (Ted's words; not mine.). Later in life Ted began to know and declare that a proud male will not change until he loses his business, his health and his marriage...usually in that order. The Gospel through individuals and families is the hope for the on-going Church of the Lord Jesus Christ. Many pastors are not discipling those entrusted to them to read, hear and speak His Word to others.  I believe the true visible church will be forced underground in the not-so-distant future. Will that true church ever die? No. I believe it will become stronger through persecution.  It always has...so this is no time to fold up in discouragement. Pick your battles. If you are in a messy church that is using up all of your emotional stamps, get out and start your own...in your home...with your family and maybe a few friends.  The Holy Spirit will teach you as you teach others. You may screw up a few doctrines here and there, but so do many pastors with a slew of degrees.  Keep the Main Thing the Main Thing:  the Lord Jesus Christ,  the Author and Finisher of our Faith.

A recommended book to encourage your hearts:   "Miraculous Movements"  by Jerry Trousdale; Thomas Nelson Publishing.

The Lord will bless you and keep you;
The Lord will lift His countenance upon you 
And He will give you peace.
The Lord will make His face to shine upon you 
And He will be gracious unto you. 

Love, Jo

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